groping myself
I’m not pregnant, I’m not going through menopause, nor am I going through puberty, so why are my breasts constantly sore and itching? For several months now my breasts have been incredibly sore, to the point where I don’t want anything or anyone touching them. Taking a shower and sleeping on my side is excruciating. To wear a t-shirt has even been painful. My nipples are so sensitive that the slightest touch sends pain through my entire body. To make matters worse, within the last few days my breasts have begun to itch like crazy. I spend my days either holding or supporting my breasts with my hands, or I’m scratching them, which doesn’t really stop the itching but only adds to the pain. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? I know people have begun to notice. I know my roommates have. I was standing in the kitchen two days ago and Soma, my roommate came in and let out a sigh, “Ahhh, stop playing with your boobs.” “I’m not playing with my boobs, they are killing me. It seems to help if I hold them up like this. I know it’s not very attractive, but I can’t stop touching them. Look, do they look bigger to you?” “Umm, maybe. For your sake you better hope they are.” “SHUT UP! You’re one to talk; your boobs aren’t much bigger than mine.”
It’s true though, I do believe my boobs are bigger. I can tell by looking and touching them. My bras are also slightly snugger. I’ve even had to adjust the straps on a few. Now, I’m not complaining about them being bigger, though I don’t want them much bigger than what they are now. I’m satisfied with the size of my breasts. I would look odd if they were any bigger. I’m more concerned with them being sore and itching. I have sought medical advice, which is I’ve looked for explanations on the internet. The only explanations I’ve found have been; pregnancy, menopause, and puberty. Now, the only likely of the three is puberty. It would explain my symptoms, but HELLO, I’m 25, I’ve gone through puberty. The different medical sites also advised me to see my gyno. Frankly, she scares me. I almost pass out every time I walk into the office. There’s something about being naked on a hard table with your legs spread eagle in the air that makes you lose all dignity. Also, I have to pee in a cup and have my blood drawn every visit. I hate needles, and I’ve never enjoyed peeing into a cup…but who does? I have avoided my yearly pap for the last two years. I’ll make the appointment but then, not show up. I’ll call and reschedule, but deep down I know I’m not going to go. After I stopped taking birth control I figured there was no point in going. If I’m not having sex, then there’s no need for birth control, which means no point for a visit. Though, I’ve recently been considering the idea of “Fewer Periods.” I keep seeing the commercial on TV and they make it sound really good. I guess I should grow some balls and go to the gyno. I can get information on fewer periods and I can finally figure out why all the sudden changes in by breasts. I guess I’ll just have to take half a bottle of ibuprofen and a muscle relaxer, like last time. God, I don’t want to go.
It’s true though, I do believe my boobs are bigger. I can tell by looking and touching them. My bras are also slightly snugger. I’ve even had to adjust the straps on a few. Now, I’m not complaining about them being bigger, though I don’t want them much bigger than what they are now. I’m satisfied with the size of my breasts. I would look odd if they were any bigger. I’m more concerned with them being sore and itching. I have sought medical advice, which is I’ve looked for explanations on the internet. The only explanations I’ve found have been; pregnancy, menopause, and puberty. Now, the only likely of the three is puberty. It would explain my symptoms, but HELLO, I’m 25, I’ve gone through puberty. The different medical sites also advised me to see my gyno. Frankly, she scares me. I almost pass out every time I walk into the office. There’s something about being naked on a hard table with your legs spread eagle in the air that makes you lose all dignity. Also, I have to pee in a cup and have my blood drawn every visit. I hate needles, and I’ve never enjoyed peeing into a cup…but who does? I have avoided my yearly pap for the last two years. I’ll make the appointment but then, not show up. I’ll call and reschedule, but deep down I know I’m not going to go. After I stopped taking birth control I figured there was no point in going. If I’m not having sex, then there’s no need for birth control, which means no point for a visit. Though, I’ve recently been considering the idea of “Fewer Periods.” I keep seeing the commercial on TV and they make it sound really good. I guess I should grow some balls and go to the gyno. I can get information on fewer periods and I can finally figure out why all the sudden changes in by breasts. I guess I’ll just have to take half a bottle of ibuprofen and a muscle relaxer, like last time. God, I don’t want to go.
